Music

One Hilarious Farmer Metal Song

In China, we have a music style called Farmer Metal or Folk Metal. This kind of music mainly just takes the piss out of pop songs. Here is a hilarious Farmer Metal song for you. (Attention: The lyrics are pretty rude, so kids and sensitive people please don’t look at them!)

This song was made by a major Chinese Farmer Metal band called Yumbi- but “major Chinese Farmer Metal band” doesn’t necessarily mean they are very popular or well-known. Nevertheless, this is one of the most brilliant songs I’ve heard in a while. It makes fun of the lyrics and tune from at least 29 Chinese and foreign songs (I think you may also recognize some). The video is just as ridiculous as the song, and besides shots of animal fornication and folk dancing, it features clips of the parodied songs. I’ve also linked to the full videos of some of the Chinese songs in the lyrics, so have a look and see if you prefer the original or the Farmer Metal cover.

(In China?  Click here to view on YouKu)

‘Death to the Ten-Thousand Myriad Things’ by YUMBI

Since long ago, winter cold! Summer rain! Water!
In autumn comes your voice from far away – Warm! Warm!
You say behind your house there’s snow – White! White!
In the valley there are golden flags dancing in the big wind.

I give you an old CD,
Listen to our past love.
Sometimes I suddenly forget that I still love you.
When I hear the words my face goes red and I hide.

Po Po Po Po Po Po Po Po Poker Face!

Nobo nobo nobo nobody
Chicken chicken dick dick gay gay gay
Baby baby baby baby ho
Sorry sorry sorry sorry so

Me and my last proud stubbornness,
Ignoring everyone else.
This is a simple little love song,
It instantly changes the color of the sky.

Yi la la oh la bei
Yi la so la oh la bei la.

Doesn’t matter if you love me or you don’t
They are all fucking dust of history.

I heard the sound of winter leaving,
I woke up someday,
I see you off a thousand miles away –
Wuha! Need need need need need what fucking love!

Where did you sleep last night?
Wake me up when september end s.
No woman no woman, no woman no cry!
Don’t you cry at night?

Death to all but metal suck my ass!

I have lost the will to live!
Simply nothing more to give!
There is nothing more for me,
need the end to set me free.

Punk punk is not dead.
We are carrying on our flag.
God god god save the queen!
I’m gonna be your fucking god!

My baby baby, I’m gonna pinch your little face.
People’s Road has my good mood.
Darlin darlin darlin darlin, whose dad has died?
When will you get married, Ms Wang?

Sitting in the train and treading on the green meadow,
Carrying a big flag, pushing forward desperately.
Youthfulness, youthfulness – fuck off youthfulness!
Only lived for five minutes, already starting to reminiscence!

I hear the sound of nature from your heart,
Just like the spring breeze comes suddently at night, eat some dirt and supplement some calcium.
I cannot help picking it, I cannot help gathering it,
I spread my legs and wait for you.

If life hasn’t lied to you,
You should stew a leather shoe and eat some donkey ****.
Make a cup of Tiramisu and add some mashed garlic,
Squat and shit it all out joyfully.

If one day, I’m old and there’s nobody to rely on
I’ll walk into your room in autumn
Kick in your door then sing the Coolest Ethnic song,
Watching you piss yourself peacefully.

 

万物死 by云母逼乐队

从前冬天冷啊夏天雨呀水呀
秋天传来你声音暖呀暖
你说屋后面 有白茫茫茫雪
山谷里还有金黄旗子在大风里飘

给你一张过去的CD
聆听那时我们的爱情
有时会突然忘了 依然爱着你
听了歌曲都会红着脸躲避

po po po po po po po po poker face

nobo nobo nobo nobody
鸡鸡鸡鸡基基gay gay gay
baby baby babybaby ho
sorry sorry 骚锐骚锐骚

我和我最后骄傲的倔强
不理会别人看好或看坏
这是一首简单的小情歌儿
瞬间改变天空的颜色

呀啦啦喔了呗
伊啦嗦了喔了呗啦

无论你爱或者不爱
全他妈都是历史的尘埃

听见冬天的离开
我在某年某月醒过来
我送你离开在千里之外
wuha 要要要要要他妈什么爱

where did you sleep last night
wake me up when september end s
no woman no woman no woman no cry
don·t you cry at night

death to all but metal suck my ass

i have lost the will to live
simply nothing more to give
there is nothing more for me
need the end to set me free

punk punk is not dead
we are carrying on our flag
god god god save the queen
I·m gonna be your ****ing god

我的宝贝宝贝碾碾你小脸儿
人民路有我的好心情
嗒零嗒零嗒零嗒零谁的爸死了
王小姐你什么时候嫁呀

坐上了火车踏上绿草地
扛着大旗玩儿命往前挤
青春青春青他***
才活了几天就开始回忆

我听见你心中那动人的天籁
就忽如一夜春风袭来吃土补补钙
我忍不住去采 我忍不住去摘
我劈开大腿为你等待

假如生活还没有欺骗你
就炖一个皮鞋吃一点儿驴逼
泡一杯提拉米苏放一点儿蒜泥
痛痛快快蹲下拉泡稀

如果有一天我老无所依
在秋天走进你的房间里
踹门进去就唱最炫民族风
静静看你哗哗尿一地

What do you think?

Our Correspondent
Cult China correspondent
Jia Jia - Shanghai

Recently described by Bill Murray as a "ridiculous person", I was born in a little town near Guilin in the south of China where people eat cats and rats. I hunted snakes for fun when I was a kid. Now I'm living ...

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